The King of Bedlam wears no jacket, but see
how with his hands he clasps himself straitly —
hands clamp’t under armpits, arms crossed over chest,
as if, unless so constrain’d, His Majesty might burst!
The King of Bedlam is a portly tun
whose three-legged stool he takes for a throne.
He says one thing twice, then over and over
and snorts and tweets like a pig in clover.
No jacket’s needed for such as fool as this.
In love with himself, himself he would kiss.
Hand him a looking glass, what will he do?
He’ll play the coquette and commence to woo.
Crowds gather to stare at this Humpty Dumpty
on days when His Majesty’s not feeling grumpy.
Then he’ll caper and clap and grin so wide
you can see for yourself that there’s nought inside.
* Â Â Â Â Â Â Â * Â Â Â Â Â Â Â *
Thanks to William Hogarth for setting the stage and providing a cast of characters for this update of his Bedlam scene from “A Rake’s Progress,” of 1734.